'Jus' you go downstairs, an' I'll fix
him.' So the man goes off, still a-grinnin'. 'I tell you what it
is,' says Jone, 'it wont do to let them two lunertics have rooms to
themselves. They'll set this house afire or turn it upside down in
the middle of the night, if they has. There's nuthin' to be done
but for you to sleep with the woman an' for me to sleep with the
man, an' to keep 'em from cuttin' up till mornin'.'
"So Jone he went into the room where General Tom Thumb was a-
settin' with his hat on, a-lookin' doleful at the bed, an' says he:
"'What's the matter with the bed?'
"'Oh, it's too large entirely,' says the General. 'It wouldn't do
for me to sleep in a bed like that. It would ruin my character as
a genuine Thumb.'
"'Well,' says Jone, 'it's nearly two times too big for you, but if
you an' me was both to sleep in it, it would be about right,
wouldn't it?'
"'Oh yes,' says the General. An' he takes off his hat, an' Jone
says good-night to me an' shuts the door. Our room was better than
Mrs. General Jackson's, so I takes her in there, an' the fust thing
she does is to turn on all the gases.
"'Stop that!' I hollers. 'If you do that again,--I'll--I'll break
the United States Bank tomorrow!'
"'How'll you do that?' says she.
"'I'll draw out all my capital,' says I.
"'I hope really you wont,' says she, 'till I've been there,' an'
she leans out of the open winder to look into the street, but while
she was a-lookin' out I see her left hand a-creepin' up to the gas
by the winder, that wasn't lighted.
Pages:
171
172
173
174
175
176
177
178
179
180
181
182
183
184
185
186
187
188
189
190
191
192
193
194
195