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Stockton, Frank Richard, 1834-1902

"Rudder Grange"

'Is that your husband?' says he, pointin'
to Jone. 'Yes,' says I. 'It was very good in him to come along,'
says he. 'Is these two your groomsman and bridesmaid?' 'No sir,'
says I. 'They're crazy.' 'No wonder,' says he. 'It's enough to
drive 'em so, to see you two,' an' then he went ahead an' shook
hands with Jone, an' told him he'd know'd me a long time; but he
didn't say nuthin' about havin' histed me out of a winder, for
which I was obliged to him. An' then he come back to me an' says
he, 'Good-mornin', I must go to the office. I hope you'll have a
good time for the rest of your trip. If you happen to run short o'
lunertics, jus' let me know, and I'll furnish you with another
pair.' 'All right,' says I; 'but you mustn't bring your little
girl along.'
"He kinder laughed at this, as we walked away, an' then he turned
around an' come back, and says he, 'Have you been to any the-ay-
ters, or anything, since you've been in town?' 'No,' says I, 'not
one.' 'Well,' says he, 'you ought to go. Which do you like best,
the the-ay-ter, the cir-cus, or wild-beasts?' I did really like
the the-ay-ter best, havin' thought of bein' a play-actor, as you
know, but I considered I'd better let that kind o' thing slide jus'
now, as bein' a little too romantic, right after the 'sylum, an' so
I says, 'I've been once to a circus, an' once to a wild-beast
garden, an' I like 'em both. I hardly know which I like best--the
roarin' beasts, a-prancin' about in their cages, with the smell of
blood an' hay, an' the towerin' elephants; or the horses, an' the
music, an' the gauzy figgers at the circus, an' the splendid
knights in armor an' flashin' pennants, all on fiery steeds, a-
plungin' ag'in the sides of the ring, with their flags a-flyin' in
the grand entry,' says I, real excited with what I remembered about
these shows.


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