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"The Gilded Age, Part 3."

For instance, call this
waiter St. Louis.
"And we'll lay this fork (representing the railroad) from St. Louis to
this potato, which is Slouchburg:
"Then with this carving knife we'll continue the railroad from Slouchburg
to Doodleville, shown by the black pepper:
"Then we run along the--yes--the comb--to the tumbler that's Brimstone:
"Thence by the pipe to Belshazzar, which is the salt-cellar:
"Thence to, to--that quill--Catfish--hand me the pincushion, Marie
Antoinette:
"Thence right along these shears to this horse, Babylon:
"Then by the spoon to Bloody Run--thank you, the ink:
"Thence to Hail Columbia--snuffers, Polly, please move that cup and
saucer close up, that's Hail Columbia:
"Then--let me open my knife--to Hark-from-the-Tomb, where we'll put
the candle-stick--only a little distance from Hail Columbia to
Hark-from-the-Tomb--down-grade all the way.
"And there we strike Columbus River--pass me two or throe skeins of
thread to stand for the river; the sugar bowl will do for Hawkeye, and
the rat trap for Stone's Landing-Napoleon, I mean--and you can see how
much better Napoleon is located than Hawkeye.


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