Through me she had been mocked and derided!
It was all anguish to me. For her there was no shame, no humiliation, no
pain I would not suffer, and take joy in the suffering so that it be for
her. But to have submitted that sweet, angelic woman to suffering--to have
incurred her just anger! Woe me!
I came to the table that evening full of uneasiness, very unhappy, feeling
it an effort to bring myself into her presence and endure be it her regard
or her neglect. To my relief she sent word that she was not well and would
keep her chamber; and Fifanti smiled oddly as he stroked his blue chin and
gave me a sidelong glance. We ate in silence, and when the meal was done,
I departed, still without a word to my preceptor, and went to shut myself
up again in my room.
I slept ill that night, and very early next morning I was astir. I went
down into the garden somewhere about the hour of sunrise, through the wet
grass that was all scintillant with dew. On the marble bench by the pond,
where the water-lilies were now rotting, I flung myself down, and there was
I found a half-hour later by Giuliana herself.
She stole up gently behind me, and all absorbed and moody as I was, I had
no knowledge of her presence until her crisp boyish voice startled me out
of my musings.
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