Alas! This year has taught me that
we can neither deceive nor escape our destiny, since we carry it in our
hearts and temperaments.
Here I am, and here I shall remain, until I have grown to be quite an
old woman. Therefore, it is very foolish of me to pour out this
confession to you, for it cannot be otherwise than painful reading. But
I shall have no peace of mind until it is done.
My life has been poor. I have consumed my own heart.
* * * * *
As far as I am aware, my father, a widower, was a strictly honourable
man. Misfortune befell him, and his whole life was ruined in a moment.
An unexpected audit of the accounts of his firm revealed a deficiency.
My father had temporarily borrowed a small sum to save a friend in a
pressing emergency. Henceforward he was a marked man, at home and
abroad. We left the town where we lived. The retiring pension which was
granted to him in spite of what had happened sufficed for our daily
needs. He lived lost in his disgrace, and I was left entirely to the
care of a maid-servant.
Pages:
137
138
139
140
141
142
143
144
145
146
147
148
149
150
151
152
153
154
155
156
157
158
159
160
161