One day an idea took possession of me,
with such force that I almost involuntarily exclaimed aloud. My brain
reeled as I said to myself, "Some day I will marry the great man and
live in that house!"
This ambition occupied my thoughts day and night. Other things seemed
unreal. I discovered by accident that Herr von Brincken often visited
the parents of one of my schoolmates. I took great pains to cultivate
her acquaintance, and we became inseparable.
Although I was not yet confirmed, I succeeded in getting an invitation
to a party at which Von Brincken was to be present. At that time I
ignored the meaning of love; I had not even felt that vague, gushing
admiration that girls experience at that age. But when at table this man
turned his eyes upon me with a look of astonishment, I felt
uncomfortable, with the kind of discomfort that follows after eating
something unpleasant. Later in the the evening he came and talked to me,
and I managed to draw him on until he asked whether I should like to see
his garden.
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