Then
they handed me somethin' what they called
ice cream, looked to me like a hunk of
casteel soap, wall I stuck my fork in it and
tried to bite it, and it slipped off and got
inside my vest, and in less than a minnit I
wuz froze from my chin to my toes. I
guess I cut a caper at Henry's house.
Uncle Josh in a Chinese Laundry
I S'POSE I got tangled up the other day with
the dogondest lookin' critter I calculate I
ever seen in all my born days, and I've bin
around purty considerable. I'd seen all sorts
of cooriosoties and monstrosities in cirkuses
and meenagerys, but that wuz the fust
time I'd ever seen a critter with his head
and tail on the same end. You see I
sed to a feller, now whar abouts in New
York do you folks git your washin' done;
when I left hum to come down here I lowed
I had enuff with me to do me, but I've
stayed here a little longer than I calculated
to, and if I don't git some washin' done purty
soon, I'll have to go and jump in the river.
Wall he wuz a bligin sort of a feller, and
he told me thar wuz a place round the corner
whar a feller done all the washin', so I
went round, and there was a sine on the
winder what sed Hop Quick, or Hop Soon,
or jump up and hop, or some other kind of
a durned hop; and then thar wuz a lot of
figers on the winder that I couldn't make
head nor tail on; it jist looked to me like a
chicken with mud on its feet had walked
over that winder.
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