Wall, when I wuz
gittin' purty near thar I sed, Mister, don't I
git any change? He sed, "didn't you see that
sign on the car?" I sed, no sir. Wall he
sez "you better go out and look at it."
Wall I went out and looked at it, and
that settled it. It sed "This car goes to
Coney Iland without change." Guess it did;
I'll be durned if I got any.
Wall we got down thar, and I must say
of all the pandemonium and hubbub I ever
heered in my life, Coney Iland beats it all.
Bout the fust thing I seen thar wuz a place
what they called "Shoot the Shoots." It
looked like a big hoss troff stood on end,
one end in a duck pond and tother end up
in the air, and they would haul a boat up to
the top and all git in and then cum scootin'
down the hoss troff into the pond. Wall I
alowed that ud be right smart fun, so I got
into one of the boats along with a lot of other
folks I never seed afore and don't keer if I
never see agin. They yanked us up to the
top of that troff and then turned us loose,
and I jist felt as though the whole earth had
run off and left us. We went down that troff
lickety split, and a woman what wuz settin'
alongside of me, got skeered and grabbed
me round the neck; and I sed, you let go of
me you brazen female critter. But she jist
hung on and hollered to beat thunder, and
everybody wuz a yellin' all to onct, and that
durned boat wuz a goin' faster'n greased
lightnin' and I had one hand on my pockit
book and tother on my hat, and we went
kerslap dab into that duck pond, and the
durned boat upsot and we went into the
water, and that durned female critter hung
onto me and hollered "save me, I'm jist a
drownin'.
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