So he got into
the ring, and that mule he took after Ruben
and chased him 'round that ring so fast
Ruben could see himself goin' 'round t'other
side of the ring. He wuz mighty glad to
git out of thar. Then a gal cum out on hoss
back and commenced ridin' around. Nancy
Smith sed she wuz a brazen critter to cum
out thar without clothes enough on her to
dust a fiddle. But Deacon Witherspoon sed
that wuz the art of 'questrinism; we all
alowed it, whatever he meant. And then
that silly old clown he told the ring master
that his uncle committed sooiside different
than any man what ever committed sooiside;
and the ring master sed, "Wall, sir, how did
your uncle commit sooiside?" and that silly
old clown sed, "Why, he put his nose in his
ear and blowed his head off." Then he sang
an old-fashioned song I hadn't heered in a
long time; went something like this:
From Widdletown to Waddletown is fifteen miles,
From Waddletown to Widdletown is fifteen miles,
From Widdletown to Waddletown, from Waddletown
to Widdletown,
Take it all together and its fifteen miles.
He wuz about the silliest cuss I ever seen.
Wall, I noticed a feller a rummagin' 'round
among the benches as though he might
a-lost somethin'. So I sed to him, "Mister,
did you lose anythin' 'round here any place?"
He sed, "Yes, sir, I lost a ten dollar bill; if
you find it I'll give you two dollars.
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