Then one day I
sent him out in the garden to plant some
pertaters and some unyuns fer me, and it jist
seemed like that feller didn't have good hoss
sense. He planted them unyuns and pertaters
right alongside of each other, and the
unyuns got into the pertaters' eyes and they
couldn't see to grow. Oh, yes, lots of fun
down home onct in a while. I calculate
I've got the funnyest lot of chickens you
ever heerd tell on. I've got sixty old hens
and they lay an egg every day; but they
don't lay any at nite, cos when nite comes
every one of them is roosters. I had one
old hen, she went into the woodshed and sot
down on the ax and tried to hatch-it. I had
another one sottin' on a door knob, tryin' to
hatch out a house and lot, but she didn't.
While she wuz a-sottin' there along cum a
rooster, and he sed, "We're having a little
party down behind the barn; will you dance
with me this set?" and she sed, "No, sir,
I'm engaged to his nobs for this set." Gosh,
I wuz afraid to go out in the barnyard one
while, cos one day when I wuz out thar I
heerd a hen say to a rooster, "Thar's that
old gray-headed cuss we've bin a-layin' fer."
Guess that's my train; s'pose I'll have to
be a-goin'; good-bye; cum down and see
me some time if you kin, ev'ry one of ye;
cum down about apple-butter time and jist
butt in--good bye.
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