He had
on a biled collar that sort of put me in mind
of the whitewashed fence 'round the fair
grounds down hum. I'll bet if he'd ever
sneeze it would cut his ears off.
Wall, anyhow, he sed to that front boy,
"Show the gentleman to the proprietor's
offis." Wall, I went along with that boy,
and presently we cum to a place in one corner
of that store; it wuz made out of iron
and had bars in front of the winders, and
looked like the county jale. The front boy
p'inted to a man and sed, "Go in," and I
sed, "I gessed I wouldn't go in thar, cos I
hadn't done anything to be locked up fer."
And that front boy commenced to laffin' tho'
durned if I could see what he wuz a-laffin'
about, and the storekeeper he opened the
door and cum out, and he sed, "Good mornin',
what can I do fer you?" I sed, "Be
you the storekeeper?" and he sed he wuz.
So I sed, "Do you want to buy any pertaters?"
And he sed, "No, sir, we don't buy
pertaters here; this a dry goods store." So
I sed, "Wall, don't want any cabbage, do
ye?" And he sed, "No, sir, this is a dry
goods store." So I sed, "Wall, now, I
want to know; do you need any onions?"
And by chowder, he got madder 'n a wet
hen. He sed, "Now look a-heer, I want
you to understand onct fer all, this is a dry
goods store, and we don't buy anything but
dry goods and don't sell anything but dry
goods; do you understand me now? DRY
GOODS.
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