Just
now I'm engaged in closing up a little deal by which I expect to make
$3.50 in real money."
A teacher asked those pupils who wanted to go to heaven to raise their
hands. All except little Ikey's hands went up. The teacher asked him
if he didn't want to go to heaven and Ikey replied that he had heard
his father tell his mother that 'Business had all gone to hell' and
Ikey wanted to go where the business had gone.
The vicar's appeal had been a most eloquent one, and had even
penetrated the depths of Mr. Blackleigh's granite organ. The latter
came forward and offered L50 for the fund.
The worthy cleric was overjoyed.
"I don't know your name, sir," he cried; "but I thank you from the
bottom of my heart. I thank you! May your business prosper, sir!"
Then there was a solemn hush, and the committee looked askance at
their vicar.
"What's the matter?" whispered the clergyman, turning to the chairman.
"Well--er--that donor is an undertaker!"
"There is one respect in which a live business man isn't like a tree."
"What is that?"
"If he remains rooted to the spot, he can't branch out."
During a campaign preceding the election of a Missouri Congressman it
was suggested that, since he posed as a good business man, he might be
willing to tell just what a good business man is.
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