Not bad, is it?"
At a Chamber of Commerce dinner a speaker dwelt at great length upon
the suffering people of China. He suggested that all present should
give something for them. A small dry-goods merchant arose and said:
"You have made for me a feeling already that something should be
given. I move that we give three cheers for China."
"I'm sorry that my engagements prevent my attending your charity
concert, but I shall be with you in spirit."
"Splendid! And where would you like your spirit to sit? I have tickets
here for half a dollar, a dollar and two dollars."
A physician whose sole fee is the consciousness of doing good.
CHEERFULNESS
HE--"There's nothing like cheerfulness. I admire anyone who sings at
his work."
SHE--"How you must love a mosquito!"
CHICKEN STEALING
An old negro was charged with chicken-stealing, and the judge said:
"Where's your lawyer, uncle?"
"Ain't got none, jedge."
"But you ought to have one," returned the Court. "I'll assign one to
defend you."
"No, sah, no, sah, please don't do dat," begged the defendant.
"Why not?" persisted the judge. "It won't cost you anything. Why don't
you want a lawyer?"
"Well, Ah'll tell yo', jedge," said the old man confidentially.
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