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Stein, Gertrude, 1874-1946

"More Toasts"

"
LANDLORD--"But that's what you said last month."
ARTIST--"You see I keep my word; you can have confidence in me."

_See also_ Bills; Debts.


COLLECTION BOX

_See_ Contribution box.


COLLEGE GRADUATES

"There's a college graduate at the door. He wants a job."
"What can he do?" asked the self-made man.
"He says he's pretty good in Greek."
"Umph! Tell him I haven't sold $1 worth of goods to Greece since I've
been in the export business."


COLLEGE STUDENTS

"I am delighted to meet you," said the father of the college student,
shaking hands warmly with the professor. "My son took algebra from you
last year, you know."
"Pardon me," said the professor, "he was exposed to it, but he did not
take it."

RUPERT--"What did you do with the cuffs I left on the table last
night?"
ROLAND--"They were so soiled I sent them to the laundry."
RUPERT--"Ye gods, the entire history of England was on them."

'07--"You are always behind in your studies."
'23--"Well, you see, sir, it gives me a chance to pursue them."

STUDENT (writing home)--"How do you spell 'financially'?"
OTHER--"F-i-n-a-n-c-i-a-l-l-y, and there are two R's in
'embarrassed.


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