"
OLD DAME--"You've had two penn'orth of sweets, my little man, but
you've only given me a penny."
THE LITTLE MAN--"Yes, but farver says one penny's got to do the work
of two in war-time."--_Punch_.
"Of course you have your little theory about the cause of the high
cost of living?"
"I have," replied Mr. Growcher: "too many people are trying to make
political economy take the place of domestic economy."
HE--"Yes, I certainly like good food, and always look forward to the
next meal."
SHE--"Why don't you talk of higher things once in a while?"
HE--"But, my dear, what is higher than food?"--_Life_.
A certain judge, after passing sentence, always gave advice to
prisoners. Having before him a man found guilty of stealing, he
started thus:
"It you want to succeed in this world you must keep straight. Now, do
you understand?"
"Well, not quite," said the prisoner; "but if your lordship will tell
me how a man is to keep straight when he is trying to make boths ends
meet, I might."
And another trouble with the country is that too many are trying to
satisfy a bricklayer's appetite on a school-teacher's salary.
SMALL BOY (much interested in shopman's reason for high price
of eggs)--"But, mummy, how do the hens know we're at war with
Germany?"--_Punch_.
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