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Stein, Gertrude, 1874-1946

"More Toasts"

Whit wad ye say to Union Street?"

MAUDE--"What makes you think his intentions are serious?"
MABEL--"When he first began to call he used to talk about the books I
like to read."
MAUDE--"And now?"
MABEL--"Now he talks about the things he likes to eat."--_Life_.

"Cheer up, old man! There's other fish in the sea."
REJECTED SUITOR-"Yes, but the last one took all my bait!"--_Life_.

NEIGHBOR--"Got much money in your bank, Bobby?"
BOBBY--"Gee, no! The depositors have fallen off somethin' fierce since
sister got engaged."
"So you want to marry my daughter, eh?" snorted the old man. "Do you
consider yourself financially able to do so?"
"Well," replied the suitor, "after a fellow has bought candy and
flowers for a girl for a year, and has taken her to the theater twice
a week and is still not broke, I guess he can afford to get married."

MR. GOODTHING--"How does your sister like the engagement ring I gave
her, Bobby?"
HER YOUNG BROTHER--"Well, it's a little too small;--she has an awful
hard time getting it off when the other fellows call!"

MR. SLOW (calling on girl)--"You seem rather--er--distant this
evening."
GIRL--"Well, your chair isn't nailed to the floor, is it?"

_See also_ Love; Proposals.


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