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Stein, Gertrude, 1874-1946

"More Toasts"


"Mother, mother," he called from his little bed, "listen to Mrs.
Jones' chickens! They must have forgotten to tell them to set their
crow back."

"Well, yes," admitted Gap Johnson, of Rumpus Ridge, Ark., "I've heerd
something or nuther about setting the clock for'ards or bac'ards for
some reason. I don't prezisely know what. But it don't make no special
difference at our house one way or tother for the clock runs about
as it pleases till some of us sorter climb up and set it b'guess and
b'gosh as you might say. And if we save or lose an hour or two what's
the odds? We've got all the time there is anyway."

Geordie Ryton, the village cobbler, bought two clocks, one a
grandfather's. He put it in a corner and placed a small nickel clock
on the mantel-shelf. The grandfather's clock has not been altered to
the Daylight Saving Bill's requirements. "Hoo is't, Geordie," asked
a customer, "ye've altered the smaal clock and not the gran'faither's
clock?"
"Wey," replied Geordie, "they said the gran'faither's clock's been
tellin' the truth for ower sixty year, an' Aa can't find it in me
heart te make a liar ov it noo. But the little begger wes made in
Jarmany, so it'll be aal reet, he's as reet as can be for that job.


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