SEARCH
0-9 A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
Prev | Current Page 219 | Next

Stein, Gertrude, 1874-1946

"More Toasts"


"Bill," said the superintendent--and the words quivered with
energy--"I want this job rushed. Every hour's delay costs the company
money. Have you got the engineer's plans for the new bridge?"
"I don't know," said the bridge-builder, "whether the engineer has
the picture drawed yet or not, but the bridge is up and the trains is
passin' over it."--_Harper's_.

"Better consider my course in efficiency training. I can show you how
to earn more money than you are getting."
"I do that now."

The boy was very small and the load he was pushing in the wheelbarrow
was very, very big.
A benevolent old gentleman, putting down his bundles, lent him a
helping hand.
"Really, my boy," he puffed, "I don't see how you manage to get that
barrow up the gutters alone."
"I don't," replied the appreciative kid. "Dere's always some jay
a-standin' round as takes it up for me."--_Puck_.

MRS. CASEY--"Me sister writes me that every bottle in that box we sent
her was broken. Are you sure yez printed 'This side up, with care' on
it!"
CASEY--"Oi am. An' for fear they shouldn't see it on the top, Oi
printed it on the bottom, as well."

COW--"Can you beat it? There's so much system around here now that
they file me in the barn under the letter C.


Pages:
207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231