A few months later the lady returned and asked how much it would cost
her to have the inscription effaced and another substituted.
"No need of that, marm," replied the man, soothingly; "you see, I left
jes' enough room to add 'alone.'"
THE TOMBSTONE MAN (after several abortive suggestions)--"How would
simply, 'Gone Home' do?"
MRS. NEWWEEDS--"I guess that would be all right. It was always the
last place he ever thought of going."--_Puck_.
Here lies my wife: here let her lie!
Now she's at rest, and so am I.
--_John Dryden_.
"Did you hear about the defacement of Mr. Skinner's tombstone?" asked
Mr. Brown a few days after the funeral of that eminent captain of
industry.
"No, what was it?" inquired his neighbor curiously.
"Someone added the word 'friends' to the epitaph."
"What was the epitaph?"
"He did his best."
EQUALITY
In a mood for companionship with none at hand, a New Yorker was making
her way through a quiet down town cross street to an East Side subway.
As she approached a team of horses standing by the curb, the nearer
of the pair looked her straight in the eye man-to-man like. No driver
being in sight she took from her pocket some lumps of sugar (reserved
as a tip for the ice-horse) and fed and fondled and talked foolishly
to her friend of the curb.
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