"
The magistrate looked severely at the small, red-faced man who had
been summoned before him, and who returned his gaze without flinching.
"So you kicked your landlord downstairs?" queried the magistrate. "Did
you imagine that was within the right of a tenant?"
"I'll bring my lease in and show it to you," said the little man,
growing redder, "and I'll wager you'll agree with me that anything
they've forgotten to prohibit in that lease I had a right to do the
very first chance I got."
"As a matter of fact," said the lawyer for the defendant, trying to be
sarcastic, "you were scared half to death, and don't know whether it
was a motor-car or something resembling a motor-car that hit you."
"It resembled one all right," the plaintiff made answer. "I was
forcibly struck by the resemblance."
A religious worker was visiting a Southern penitentiary, when one
prisoner in some way took his fancy. This prisoner was a negro,
who evinced a religious fervour as deep as it was gratifying to the
caller.
"Of what were you accused?" the prisoner was asked.
"Dey says I took a watch," answered the negro. "I made a good fight. I
had a dandy lawyer, an' he done prove an alibi wif ten witnesses.
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