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Stein, Gertrude, 1874-1946

"More Toasts"

"Let's consider that we have
made this deal and that it has succeeded. You make a hundred dollars
and I save five hundred."

_Higher Authority_
"Mr. Brown is outside," said the new office-boy. "Shall I show him
in?".
"Not on your life!" exclaimed the junior partner. "I owe him ten
dollars."
"Show him in," calmly said the senior member of the firm. "He owes me
twenty-five."

BUSINESS MAN (explaining)--"When they say 'money is easy,' they mean
simply that the supply is greater than the demand."
HIS WIFE--"Goodness! I shouldn't think such a thing possible."

SMITHSON--"Do you know that Noah was the greatest financier that ever
lived?"
DIBBS--"How do you make that out?"
SMITHSON--"Well, he was able to float a company when the whole world
was in liquidation."

"This car cost me thirty-five hundred dollars, Blathers, but I'll
let you have it for two thousand, eh? It's a clean gift of fifteen
hundred," said Bolivar. "Eh, what do you say?"
"No," said Blathers, "I can't do that; but suppose you give me five
hundred dollars and keep the car, eh? Clean saving of a thousand, eh?
What?"

The present financial situation gives the lie to the old adage that
Exchange is no robbery.


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