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Stein, Gertrude, 1874-1946

"More Toasts"

"--_Puck_.

HURRY--"What's happened to Speeder. I haven't seen him for weeks?"
CANE--"Oh, he tried all the different makes of cars and then bought an
aeroplane."
HURRY--"Has he crashed?"
CANE--"Well, not exactly. He started on a cross-country flight the
other day, heard something rattle and absent-mindedly climbed out to
look under the machine."

"For ten years," said the new boarder, "my habits were as regular as
clockwork. I rose on the stroke of six, and half an hour later was at
breakfast; at seven I was at work; dined at one; had supper at six,
and was in bed at nine thirty. Ate only plain food, and hadn't a day's
illness all the time."
"Dear me!" said a hearer, in sympathetic tones; "and what were you in
for?"

DOCTOR--"I have to report, sir, that you are the father of triplets."
POLITICIAN--"Impossible! I'll demand a recount."--_Puck_.

Ill habits gather by unseen degrees,
As brooks make rivers, rivers run to seas.
--_Dryden_.

"Habit" is hard to overcome.
If you take off the first letter, it does not change "a bit."
If you take off another, you have a "bit" left.
If you take still another the whole of "it" remains.
If you take still another, it is not "t"-totally used up.


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