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Stein, Gertrude, 1874-1946

"More Toasts"

--_Harper's_.

The good fairy brought an ingot of lead and an ingot of gold and laid
them before him. "Choose!" she said, simply.
The child thought a moment, and chose the lead.
"It's no heavier to carry, it's just as good to eat, and it won't make
everybody hate me!" quoth he.
The good fairy laughed.
"You can be happy without any help from me," she chirped, and flew
away.


HASH

The literary boarder fastened his eyes upon the hash.
"Kindly pass the Review of Reviews," he said.

They had hash on Monday for dinner, after a roast of beef on Sunday,
as happens in all well-regulated families. Father had said grace, when
Bobbie said:
"I don't see why you asked another blessing this evening, father. You
did it yesterday over this. It's the same old stuff."

SHE (thoughtfully)--"Did you ever think much about reincarnation,
dear?"
'18 (otherwise)--"Think about it? I eat it nearly every day--only we
call it hash."


HASTE

Ten people hurry, to catch up where one hurries to get ahead.

The more haste, ever the worst speed.--_Churchill_.

Whoever is in a hurry shows that the thing he is about is too big for
him. Haste and hurry are very different things.


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