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Stein, Gertrude, 1874-1946

"More Toasts"

When, after much labor, the document was completed,
the client asked:
"Have you fixed this thing, as I wished it, tight and strong?"
"I have done my best," said the lawyer.
"Well," continued the client, "I want to ask you another thing--not
professionally, however. As a friend, and man to man, who do you think
stands the best chance of getting the property when I am gone?"

The attorneys for the prosecution and defense had been allowed fifteen
minutes each to argue the case. The attorney for the defense had
commenced his argument with an allusion to the old swimming-hole of
his boyhood days. He told in flowery oratory of the balmy air, the
singing birds, the joy of youth, the delights of the cool water--
And in the midst of it he was interrupted by the drawling voice of the
judge:
"Come out, Chauncey," he said, "and put on your clothes. Your fifteen
minutes are up."

It is related that when Judge Benjamin Toppan of Ohio, who died in
the early '70s, applied for admission to the bar of that state he was
asked just two questions. "Mr. Toppan, what is law?" was the first of
these.
"An unjust distribution of justice," replied the applicant.
"What is equity?" was the second.


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