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Stein, Gertrude, 1874-1946

"More Toasts"

Most
of the attorneys and barristers having subscribed, one of them applied
to Toler, afterwards Lord Chief Justice Norbury, expressing his hope
that he would also subscribe his shilling.
"Only a shilling!" said Toler; "only a shilling to bury an attorney!
Here is a guinea; go and bury one-and-twenty of them."

_See also_ Judges.


LAZINESS

"I was in need of help to harvest my prune crop," said the grower,
"and I went to a saloon in a near-by city. On entering the place I
accosted the barkeeper, and asked him if any of the men lounging about
the place cared for employment at good wages.
"'I dunno,' said the mixer, 'yer better ask 'em.'
"'Any of you men want to go to work?' I said.
"There was a dead silence for a few moments, when one of the loafers
spoke up and queried, 'What doing, and what do yer pay?'
"'Picking prunes,' I replied, 'and I pay three dollars a day and
board.'
"'What kind of a place is it?' asked the garrulous one.
"'It is an attractive rolling orchard,' I answered.
"The I. W. W. spokesman rose from his chair, yawned, stretched
himself, and said, 'Well, roll her in here and let's see her, and
we'll tell yer if we wants the job.'"

A morning paper complains that "eggs ought to be more plentiful and
cheaper than they are at the present time.


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