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Stein, Gertrude, 1874-1946

"More Toasts"

"

A small boy came hurriedly down the street, and halted breathlessly in
front of a stranger going in the same direction.
"Have you lost half a crown?" he asked with his hand in his pocket.
"Y-es, yes, I believe I have!" said the stranger feeling in his
pockets. "Have you found one?"
"Oh, no," said the small boy. "I just want to see how many have been
lost today. Yours makes fifty-four!"

The young lady from New York was inclined to belittle things.
"Why," she remarked, "I could find my way up this mountain path
alone."
"Wal," responded the native, "a young couple went up this path last
year and never came back."
"Oh, my! Were they lost?"
"Nope," was the reply, "they went down the other side!"

The other day when the beach was crowded, a small boy, looking rather
bewildered, approached a police officer and said, "Please, sir, have
you seen anything of a lady around here?"
"Why, yes," answered the officer, "I've seen several."
"Well, have you seen any without a little boy?"
"Yes."
"Well," said the little chap, as a relieved look crossed his face,
"I'm the little boy. Where's the lady?"

One does not mean to be personal, but, if the young man who sat in
the chair where a lady had left a dish of maple sugar to cool at
the festival the other evening, will return the saucer, he will save
himself further trouble.


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