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Stein, Gertrude, 1874-1946

"More Toasts"

Never judge till
after you have the facts. Nothing is so utterly devoid of reason as a
passionate hatred of any race or class. All men are much the same when
you come to know them. Class or race faults are superficial. The human
qualities strike deep.--_Dr. Frank Crane_.

A prejudice is a conviction not shared by you.

"Do you like codfish?"
"No, I don't like codfish, and I'm glad I don't like it, because if I
liked it I'd eat it, and I hate the damn stuff."


PREPAREDNESS

GRUBBS--"Are you planning to make any good resolutions?"
STUBBS--"No, I am already pretty well stocked up in that way. You see,
I never used those I made last year."


PRESCRIPTIONS

"You must give up coffee and--"
"I never drink it, doctor."
"And stop smoking."
"I don't smoke."
"Humph! that's bad. If you haven't anything to give up, I'm afraid I
can't do much for you."

"Why do you bring a check with the cocktails?"
"That isn't a check. That's the house chemist's certificate."

The curator of the museum was classifying Egyptian curios. He observed
a perplexed expression on the face of his young assistant.
"What seems to be the matter, Jones?" he asked. "Is there anything you
don't understand?"
"Yes, sir," answered the helper.


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