A Chicago paper reported that the propeller _Alaska_ was leaving port
with a cargo of 40,000 bushels of cats.
A Buffalo paper, in describing the scene when Roosevelt took the oath
of office as President, said it was a spectacle never to be forgotten
when Roosevelt, before the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court and a
few witnesses, took his simple bath.
PRISONS
BILL--"I see the authorities seriously object to the prisoners forging
checks while in Sing Sing."
TILL--"Well, I suppose they think it is particularly bad form for the
prisoners to do that sort of thing while enjoying the hospitality of
the State."
VISTOR (at the jail)--"Poor man! What are you locked up here for?"
PRISONER (wearily)--"I suppose they think I'd get out if I wasn't."
PROFANITY
When father came home to dinner he observed a vacant chair at the
table. "Where's the boy?" he asked, nodding to the chair.
"Harry is up-stairs," came in a tone of painful precision from the
mother.
"I hope he is not sick."
There was an anxious pause. "No, he is not sick," continued the
mother. "It grieves me to say, Richard, that our son, your son, has
been heard swearing on the street. I heard him myself.
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