"
I, U.S. Boose, realizing that the jag is up, declare this to be
my last will and testament: To my beloved Cocktail I bequeath
three-fourths of my evil estate, and to my faithful Highball I leave
a large share of the blame. To my sister, Wine, I give the family
grapevine and kitchen still. To my cousin, Cider, I bequeath the old
apple orchard and enough wormy fruit to keep the country moist and my
memory green.
"So you're a moonshiner?" remarked the interested tourist. The lanky
mountaineer drew himself up haughtily.
"Mister, you got me wrong," he asserted. "Since prohibition come in
we-uns call ourselves irrigation engineers."
_Discovery_
I met a man
Who knows a woman
Who has a sister
Who is married to a man
Who is related to a girl
Who knows a man
Who knows a man
Who has never pulled a prohibition joke.
I shall try to trace him.
And when the nations disarm, some statesman will slip in a joker
permitting the building of battleships for medicinal purposes.
A drunkard of long standing has been reformed by an operation which
removed a bone that pressed against the brain. The Detroit News also
reports a number of cures effected by the removal of a brass rail that
was pressing against the foot.
Pages:
492
493
494
495
496
497
498
499
500
501
502
503
504
505
506
507
508
509
510
511
512
513
514
515
516