This is what he read:
"A five-dollar bill flew around the corner"
He studied it carefully.
"Well," he finally said, "I'd simply put a period after it, like
this."
"I wouldn't," said the high-school girl; "I'd make a dash after it!"
PUNISHMENT
In one of the many navy schools a young instructor was attempting to
teach English to a gruff old sailor. "What is a complete sentence?" he
said.
"Solitary confinement, bread and water," was the grim reply.
Among the Monday morning culprits haled before a Baltimore police
magistrate was a darky with no visible means of support.
"What occupation have you here in Baltimore?" asked his Honor.
"Well, jedge," said the darky, "I ain't doin' much at present--jest
circulatin' round, suh."
His Honor turned to the clerk of the court and said:
"Please enter the fact that this gentleman has been retired from
circulation for sixty days."
"Germany is going to be badly surprised when the Allies' peace terms
are read to her. The peace terms are very severe--just, but very
severe."
The speaker was Assistant Secretary of the Navy Roosevelt. He went on:
"Germany is going to feel like Rastus Rosin, who was convicted of
stealing a hog.
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