"Seeds!" exclaimed Jorkins, angrily. "It looks more like one of my
hens!"
"That's all right," said the other. "The seeds are
inside."--_Harper's_.
"What's coming off out in front there?" asked the proprietor of the
Tote Fair store in Tumlinville, Ark.
"A couple of fellers from Straddle Ridge swapped mules," replied the
clerk, "and now each is accusing the other of skinning him."
"Well, then, why don't they trade back?"
"I reckon they are both afraid of getting skinned again."
MOTHER--"Joan, darling, run and call Fido, will you?"
JOAN--"I don't see how I can, mummy, 'cos I aren't speakin' to Fido
since he broke my doll!"
"It was mighty nice of you to give up your seat to that stout old
lady, Mr. Blinks. It is pleasant to see that there are still some
polite men left in the world."
"Sorry, Mrs. Jabbers, but it wasn't politeness at all. The man who sat
next to me was quarrelsome because he said I crowded him too much,
and all I did was to use that stout old lady as a sort of retort
courteous."--_Judge_. "All sorts and conditions of men have excellent
explanations for their position in life," said the Senator. "A tramp,
however, came under my observation who had no illusions about the
cause of his own condition.
Pages:
533
534
535
536
537
538
539
540
541
542
543
544
545
546
547
548
549
550
551
552
553
554
555
556
557