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Stein, Gertrude, 1874-1946

"More Toasts"

"--_Life_.

Believe that story false that ought not to be true.--_Sheridan_.

Willing to wound, and yet afraid to strike,
Just hint a fault, and hesitate dislike;
Alike reserv'd to blame, or to commend,
A tim'rous foe, and a suspicious friend.
--_Pope_.

The scandal of the world is what makes the offence; it is not sinful
to sin in silence.--_Moliere_.


SCHOLARSHIP

"What's the matter? You look thoughtful."
"My six-year-old son brought home a list of questions to answer."
"What of that?"
"My average ranks me as a deficient kid."

"Is my son getting well grounded in the classics?" asked the
millionaire.
"I would put it even stronger than that," replied the private tutor.
"I may say that he is actually stranded on them."

"Tommy Tucker is the worst boy in school, Harry, and I want you to
keep as far away from him as you possibly can."
"I do, mother. He stays at the head of the class most of the time."

_See also_ College students.


SCHOOLS

A keen-eyed mountaineer led his overgrown son into a country
schoolhouse. "This here boy's arter larnin'," he announced. "What's
yer bill o'fare?"
"Our curriculum, sir," corrected the schoolmaster, "embraces
geography, arithmetic, trigonometry--"
"That'll do," interrupted the father.


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