More 'andsome. 'Ow do I know? Your husband told me so."
"That will do," said her mistress, frigidly.
"But I ain't finished yet!" retorted Mary Ann. "I can give a better
kiss than you! You want to know 'oo told me that, mum?"
"If you mean to suggest that my husband--"
"No, it wasn't your 'usband this time," said Mary Ann. "It was your
chauffeur."
Mrs. Bliffkins met Mary Smith, whom she had recommended to a neighbor
for a situation.
"How are you getting on at your new place?" asked Mrs. Bliffkins.
"Very well, thank you," was the reply.
"I am glad to hear it," remarked Mrs. Bliffkins. "Your employer is a
very nice lady, and you cannot do too much for her."
"I don't mean to, ma'am," replied Mary.
MRS. SMYTHE DE WILLOUGHBY--"Was the grocer's boy impudent again this
morning, Clara, when you telephoned the order?"
CLARA--"'E was, mum! But I didn't 'arf give 'im wot for. I sez, 'Who
d'yer blinkin' well think you're a-talkin 'to? I'm Mrs. Smythe der
Willoughby!'"--_Punch_.
MRS. GLABBERDEEN--"Of course you, too, must often change cooks?"
MRS. JALPERDILL--"Oh, don't speak of it! We suffer from such a
continual going and coming that we've decided this winter to equip our
kitchen with revolving doors.
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