"He said, 'O Lord, we thank thee for our food and Raymond.'"
SUPERSTITION
MRS. WIGGS--"Is Billy sick, Mrs. Skinner?"
MRS. SKINNER--"Well, 'e ain't exactly sick, but no stummick can stand
thirteen buns! It's an unlucky number."-_Puck_.
"And you wouldn't begin a journey on Friday?"
"Not I."
"I can't understand how you can have faith in such a silly
superstition."
"No superstition about it. Saturday's my pay day."
SURPRISE
"Do you think Gladys was surprised when I proposed to her?" inquired
the happy youth.
"About as surprised," answered Miss Cayenne, "as a candidate who has
received formal notification that he has been nominated."
Boss entering his factory caught two of his employees shooting craps
during working hours. "Oh! what is the matter with you?"
"Well boss, I can't help it, you see you got rubber heels."
SYMPATHY
BEGGAR--"I haven't tasted food for a month."
DYSPEPTIC--"You ain't missing much. It's the same old taste."
Every seat was occupied, when a group of women got in. The conductor
noticed a man who he thought was asleep.
"Wake up!" shouted the conductor.
"I wasn't asleep," said the passenger.
"Not asleep! Then what did you have your eyes closed for?"
"It was because of the crowded condition of the car," explained the
passenger.
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