'"
MRS. Y.--"But suppose it's some one you want to see?"
MRS. X.--"Oh, then I say, 'So fortunate, I've just come in.'"
WIFE--"But, my dear, you've forgotten again that today is my
birthday."
HUSBAND--"Er--listen, love. I know I forgot it, but there isn't a
thing about you to remind me that you are a day older than you were a
year ago."
Little Charlotte accompanied her mother to the home of an
acquaintance, where a dinner-dance was being given. When the
dessert-course was reached the little girl was brought down and given
a place next to her mother at the table.
The hostess was a woman much given to talking, and, in relating some
interesting incidents, quite forgot to give little Charlotte anything
to eat.
After some time had elapsed, Charlotte could bear it no longer. With
the sobs rising in her throat, she held up her plate as high as she
could and said:
"Does anybody want a clean plate?"
A Tommy on furlough entered a jeweler's shop and, placing a
much-battered gold watch on the counter, said, "I want this 'ere
mended."
After a careful survey the watchmaker said, "I'm afraid, sir, the cost
of repairing will be double what you gave for it."
"I don't mind that," said the soldier.
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