Mrs. Jenkins, a regular visitor in the doctor's consulting room,
started on the long story of her troubles. The doctor endured it
patiently and gave her another bottle. At last she started out, and
the doctor was congratulating himself, when she stopped and exclaimed:
"Why, doctor, you didn't look to see if my tongue was coated."
"I know it isn't," wearily replied the medical man. "You don't find
grass on a race track."
Another one of our patrons finds her husband a trifle too studious.
She called for a volume of Blackstone he had ordered and when she saw
the ominous size of the volume sighed deeply, "That means I'll have to
go out nights. He says I talk too much!"
_See also_ Wives; Woman.
TARDINESS
MR. PECK--"Would you mind compelling me to move on, officer? I've been
waiting on this corner three hours for my wife!"--_Puck_.
"Why is it you never get to the office on time in the morning?"
demanded the boss angrily.
"It's like this, boss," explained the tardy one, "you kept telling
me not to watch the clock during office hours, and I got so I didn't
watch it at home either."
"This is the fourth morning you've been late, Rufus," said the man to
his colored chauffeur.
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