Pat shouted again, but received
no answer.
The lady of the post-office opened the door and told him to shout a
little louder, which he did, but still no answer.
Again she said he would have to speak louder.
Pat got angry at this, and turning to the lady said:
"Begorra, if I could shout any louder I wouldn't use your bloomin'
ould telephone at all!"
_See also_ Strategy.
TEMPER
Little Molly had been very trying all day. That evening, when her
grown-up sister was putting her to bed, she said she hoped the child
would be a better girl tomorrow, and not make everybody unhappy with
her naughty temper.
Molly listened in silence, thought hard for a few moments, and then
said, wisely:
"Yes, when it's me it's temper; when it's you it's nerves."
TEMPERANCE
THE MAN (to a New York waiter)--"--and a glass of good beer!"
THE WAITER--"Sorry, sir. We only serve temperance beverages."
THE MAN--"Why, I got beer in Rhode Island."
THE WAITER--"Maybe you did, sir. But that was only by an act of
Providence."
A temperance lecturer was enthusiastically denouncing the use of all
intoxicants.
"I wish all the beer, all the wine, all the whiskey in the world was
at the bottom of the ocean," he said.
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