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Stein, Gertrude, 1874-1946

"More Toasts"


"Oh, just a little sentiment, I suppose," the prisoner explained. "You
know, it's the first dollar I ever stole."

_See also_ Chicken stealing; Lawyers.


THRIFT

Mr. Benson went to New York to business, but lived in Brooklyn. Often
he was not able to get home in time for dinner at night. He told his
wife that he would phone her every day as to whether he could leave
the office or not.
Mrs. Benson was of a very thrifty disposition, and the following was
her solution of the problem: "Sam, if you find that you can't be home
for dinner, phone me at exactly six o'clock. If the telephone rings at
that hour, I'll know it is you and that you are not coming for dinner.
I won't answer it, and you'll get your nickel back."

Saving is a habit; extravagance, an art.

Secretary of War Baker tells a story of a country youth who was
driving to the county fair with his sweetheart when they passed a
booth where fresh popcorn was for sale.
"My! Abner, ain't that nice?" said the girl.
"Ain't what nice?" asked Abner.
"Why, the popcorn; it smells so awfully good," replied the girl.
"It does smell kind o' fine," drawled the youth. "I'll jest drive a
little closer so you can get a better smell.


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